extreme thinking dopamine

I have gone from one extreme of thoughtless thinking, and along the horseshoe to the other extreme of thoughtless thinking, with the "melting reality" I suppose at the centre of this thought journey.

I only got to the other extreme because I realised the possibility of meaningful thought without analysis.

I suppose, then, the most thoughtful thinking is that which is closest to the total deconstruction of one's reality in their mind.

However, the most generating thinking is on each end of the horseshoe. It is the thinking that is embedded within action, and on the other side, the thinking that is embedded within imagination and trust in it.

Both ends of the horseshoe require a kind of trust in one's thoughtlessness.

I suppose that some people spend most of their life closer to thoughtless action, while others closer to actionless thought. 

It depends what you prioritise - action or thought. 

I used to prioritize action, because that is what is fun. And the purpose of thought was to maximise action (+ it still is). The action itself, however, is thoughtless in the sense that it is chosen because it is fun or because it is instructed. In doing so, I was very much an instructor, too.

Now, I can enjoy producing thoughts as an action as part of thought, as opposed to an action as part of action.

I suppose that on each end of this horseshoe, the individual may find himself very much an "instructor" – either an instructor of action in the case of a physical social game, or an instructor of thought in the case of a schizo prophet.

This is simply because, in his deep thought, he is more imaginative and willing than the rest. He is happy. That is something that both ends of the horseshoe share. 

+Meanwhile, the one with his reality melting is far from certainty, and this may be troubling, and he doesn't see it as an achievement.

At least>his reality is melting by his own action – or, rather, inaction and total thought. If his reality does not melt by his own action (I mean, thought), then it may melt externally (which is by his external action, though he does not know it). His world that he believes in externally to him will melt, and this, too, may be troubling and feared.

When I was 16, my brain was happily melted from all the focus I had done. I could no longer control myself meaningfully. I did not know how to escape from that meaningfully (thanks to the education system which I followed along with like a good boy), so I physically suffered thoughtlessly in sleep deprivation with no-one to notice and propose better, though I was not unhappy. I had compressed all of the juice out of my brain. That was good, but it took me like a few years to learn to loosen my grip on my brain (my focused action), allowing the capacity to meaningfully control myself to return.

In doing so, my enjoyment reduced.